"The prevailing message women receive is that sexual aggression is unfeminine, that a woman’s primary sexual role is as regulator of male desire — to say yes or no, but not to pursue desires of our own. Women are still often taught that sexy is the same as “pretty,” that it means dressing a certain way and then waiting to be approached"
Here is a link to the larger interview, Lorelei Lee interviewed on Salon.com about the recent John Stagliano obscenity case:
While I certainly find the John Stagliano case to be important, I'm much more impressed with the the quote above. It captured something that had been bothering me recently.
What bothers you, some might still ask. It's that entire notion, that the lone tactic a woman might have in her sexual arsenal is to look pretty and wait for suitors. That works my nerves on a couple different ends for me, since I don't really like to risk the rejection of asking someone out, and since a part of me wants to be approached by someone interesting and pretty.
For the last few days, I've had the song "Pretty Women," from Sweeney Todd stuck in my head. Here it is: